life, Love and Connection, relationships, Uncategorized, Wealth

The Things I learned from Dating a Mexican Millionaire

Here’s 5 things I learned about money, racism and girlfriends

I have always been somebody who doesn’t care about money, living most of my life on a budget. I am a traveler and I usually try to stay away from the money-focused society, preferring to spend my days lazing away in a hammock with other backpackers. When I met my now-boyfriend on Tinder, I thought he would be just like any other random Tinder match. Even when we had our first date, I did not recognise the signs that he could be ultra-rich. Sure, he paid for everything and picked one of the most expensive restaurants in town, but for all I knew he was just trying to impress me.

As our dating life evolved, I started to realise he was not just the average Joe (or Juan). We always stayed in the fanciest hotels, had the nicest dinners and our weekend getaways were dripping in luxury. His gifts consisted of the newest Apple products to $3,000 plane tickets and even a car landed on my doorstep at one point.

Mexico is infamous for narcos and cocaine, and for a while I wondered if his money came from those sources. Was I starting to develop feelings for a drug-trafficker? During the course of our relationship I realised that was not the case and while I know now that not every Mexican rich guy is involved with Cartels, I did learn five other important lessons about dating a Mexican millionaire.

Here is some of what I have learned:

1. Most Rich Mexican Men Have Multiple Girlfriends

I don’t know if this has something to do with the Latino macho culture dominating this side of the world or if it is a common thing for rich people, but I have yet to find a wealthy Mexican who is faithful.

I know this might sound as if I am generalizing, but it just seems to be part of the high-class culture here. While my own boyfriend also has a wife and decided to open up his marriage, almost all of his (married) male friends have multiple secret girlfriends and/or fuckbuddies.

There is separate time reserved for the family and then there is time for their alter-lives and the additional girls. The men all know the wives of their friends but encourage each other to invite more girls and even share fuckbuddies between them. It is not uncommon either to celebrate birthdays with gifts in girls — your buddy organises a luxury party for you with many girls involved. Most men have a wife plus one or two girlfriends (mostly in other cities/countries) and numerous friends with benefits.

2. The Mexican Upper-layer is Miles from the Poorest

With the top 10% of the Mexican population earning more than 42% of the national income, it is no wonder that there is a massive wealth inequality. Only seven other countries in the world have a bigger gap between rich and poor than Mexico.

For me, navigating alongside the top rich layer meant I could clearly see how big the differences really are. It makes you think twice when you are sitting at your dinner table sipping away on a $500 bottle of wine and wearing a $1,000 dress, while a few meters away from you a poor mother is begging for five pesos to feed her child.

It seems that most of the rich stay miles away from the poor, only using them as their staff while paying them an average Mexican wage — which is as low as $10 a day, making the gap even bigger.

On top of that, the Mexican tax law is flexible towards those who earn profits from capital and dividends, making the rich even richer just by being wealthy. Combine that with a corrupt government that also profits from that same structure and you have a country that will make it to the top 10 richest nations with the biggest number of poor people.

3. Cash Needs to be Spent and This is How They do it

As a budget traveler, I have never spent much time among the rich and famous, and tried to stay away from the upper class. But when I fell in love with my boyfriend, I was bound to get a fair amount of time in this societal layer of Mexico.

I noticed that many of them have a lot of cash and avoid paying with credit cards, probably to avoid getting taxed on their income.

So how do they spend that cash?

They buy the best, most expensive things. Whether it’s cars, holidays or clothes, they don’t blink twice at the price tag and buy the first thing they see.

Some of them spend up big on properties, others on toys like private planes, yachts, jet skis, sports gear, etc. Or they spend it on boob jobs or other gifts for their girlfriends. They go to the best restaurants and buy the most expensive items on the menu, pay their high-class escort girls and always have a few private assistants around to help them with daily chores. Luckily, some of them also spend it on charity or (private) non-profit foundations.

I don’t think that I will ever get used to the amount of money that is flowing around them. Even after spending almost a year together with my boyfriend now, it still amazes me how easily the cash gets exchanged. Luckily, he is also generous with sharing his wealth with the less fortunate, mostly tipping almost twice the amount of the bill to the workers and never failing to give some notes to the beggars in the street.

4. Racism is More Real Than Ever

Generally speaking, in Mexico being white means being privileged. These people are most-likely born into Spanish heritage; their families gained status and wealth long before they first opened their eyes. White Mexicans have more access to education, healthcare and jobs, live in the wealthier parts of the country and generally have a better future ahead of them.

Three-quarters of the indigenous people live in extreme poverty and Mexico’s poorest regions inhabit the most dark-skinned people.

Most commercials only display white Mexicans; politicians and academics are mostly white; expensive houses are owned by light-skinned Mexicans while the housekeepers and gardeners are dark. Construction workers and restaurant staff are mostly dark-skinned, and they are serving mostly white people.

Spending time with a lot of wealthy Mexicans, I experienced first-hand that indeed the richest layer consists mainly of light-skinned people and their staff is dark. They all seem to accept this is part of their reality and both groups generally don’t hang out with each other. Many of the rich white Mexicans expect the dark Mexicans to work for them for a low wage and this creates another massive gap between the rich and the poor and the white and dark-skinned.

5. You Will Get Spoilt, But Only if You Listen to Their Rules

Being the girlfriend of a Mexican millionaire is not always easy. You need to commit to their time schedule because they are always busy, expect you to join their high-class parties and mingle with the other girlfriends, and they want you to always be available to them.

After all, the little time they do have left generally can’t be matched to your personal schedule. You need to hide the fact that they have wives, have to always protect their privacy and spend a lot of time waiting for them when they take you out because there is always something important coming up. You will have your dinners while they are on the phone most of the time. You are probably being cheated on and you are most likely not the only girl in their life. You have to listen to their rules, which was particularly hard for me as an independent, free traveler.

Need new clothes? They give you a whole new wardrobe.

Of course, there are also the perks. They will spoil you, treat you like a princess and nothing gets too crazy. Joining a last-minute business trip to Bali? No problem! Getting your rent paid? Of course. Want to buy that new MacBook? Sure, why not. Need new clothes? They give you a whole new wardrobe. Learn a new sport? You will get a private instructor.

It’s like having a sugar daddy, but with actual love.

But maybe the biggest lesson that I have learned from dating a Mexican millionaire is that love has no boundaries.

My life completely turned around after meeting him (and not just because of his money), and we are both learning the advantages of our different lifestyles. He realised that spending quality time together with the people you love is even more valuable than earning a 7-figure income, and I learned that earning money to spend that quality together is also invaluable. And even though we are opposites in how we live our lives, in our core values we are exactly the same.

Originally published by Living Out Loud on Medium

Anna Foga is trying to be a fearless writer on topics most people don’t want to talk about. Connect and read more from Anna on Medium.

mindset, Spirituality, Wealth

The Promise of Powerful Money Charms

What’s the deal with money charms and superstitions, anyway?

“When you realize there is nothing lacking, the whole world belongs to you.”
– Lao Tzu

When I was a girl, my grandmother gave me a little pink purse with a coin inside because it was ‘bad luck’ to give someone a purse or wallet without doing so. She told me that money will bring more money, and that you shouldn’t gift someone a money bag without a coin because then it was destined to never have money in it.

Like attracts like.

It was my introduction into the superstitious world of wealth and abundance.

Beliefs about attracting money can run the gamut from the slightly lucrative to the silly, to the downright bizarre. But behind every good luck charm or superstition is a deep-rooted history connected to the charm’s origin and the culture from where it began.

Charms and superstitions about attracting money can evolve from folklore, legends, and even religion. But do they really work? And which of them is the most powerful?

Most of us could use an extra dollop of luck in the wealth department — let’s explore a few of the most popular money superstitions and find out which charm will help bring abundance into your life.

The Money Frog

Just a couple of weeks ago, I was browsing my local Hippie Shop when I overheard a conversation between the store owner and a customer. The shopper, a middle-aged woman with an 80s Metal hairdo wanted to attract more wealth into her life, they were discussing frogs.

“I keep one right here on my cash register.”

The store owner gestured at her cashbox.

My interest was perked enough to check out the very handsome brass frog resting among chunks of crystals, bottles of essential oils and an array of other ornamental creatures.

The shopper frowned. “Does it work? Does he bring you fortune?”

A somewhat thought-provoking question. I cued in for the answer:

“The trick is that you must keep your frog on the left-hand side of your room and facing inwards.”

Hmm….

My left palm got itchy.

Shopper woman was hooked. She bought the frog and other money-attracting items before departing the store looking rather satisfied.

Does it work?

“The Feng shui money frog — also known as the three-legged toad or money toad — has deep symbolic roots. It is a mythological creature with three legs that is said to attract wealth and abundance.”
— Rodika Tchi

Later that afternoon and back home, I had a lightbulb moment when I recalled the little frog sitting among the rocks in my back garden. He was here before us, left by the previous dwellers.

I have a frog! I thought.

He is green with shiny brown spots and a huge grin on his froggy-face. A bit like Kermit, really. So, I fished him out and plonked him in a pot sitting on the left-hand side of the steps just outside my office doors, the sliders open onto the back garden.

It’s still early days, so I have nothing solid to report yet — but the frog does look happy in his newly potted life.

That might be something.

So might be….

The Money Cat

Money superstitions and talismans are always fun to hear. My husband keeps a gold Maneki Neko on the sill in his office window. Its small metallic hand waves on solar-power, greeting the incoming by the front door.

I don’t even know where he got that thing but it kind of makes me feel weird when approaching the entrance door — raised paw waving…. odd look in its black eye…

The “lucky cat” with its raised paw is said to welcome abundance in one’s life.

Take a look:

The legend of the Maneki Neko originated from a story about a wealthy man who took shelter from a rainstorm under a tree next to a temple during the Edo period in Japan (17th century to mid-19th century).

From the article, 5 Interesting Facts About Maneki Neko Cats AKA Lucky Cats:

“The man noticed a cat that seemed to be beckoning to him, so he followed it inside the temple. Shortly thereafter, lightning struck the tree he had been standing under. Because the cat had saved his life, the man was so grateful, he became a benefactor of the temple and brought it much prosperity. When he passed away, a statue of the cat was made in his honor.”

Does it work?

Well, the Lucky-Cat who occupies the bottom level in my home cannot divulge such sensitive information to the mere ordinary. At least, not out loud.

Let’s just say that my husband is by no means short on cash-flow — but he does work extremely hard for his good fortune.

The Money Elephant

Years ago, my Italian girlfriend presented me with a white elephant about the size of a baseball. I have always loved and been fascinated by elephants. There is just something about the majestic animal that speaks to my soul.

I feel the same way about whales.

The first time I saw a Humpback breach some one hundred meters from where I stood on the South Australian shoreline, the experience evoked deep and indescribable feelings within.

I knew God that day.

Does it work?

Well now, using an ornamental elephant to attract abundance wasn’t necessarily cemented in my belief-system, but hey, I am nothing if not open-minded — who was I to question ancient symbolisms, legends and philosophy passed down by the likes Hindu Gods?

I did as I was told.

My gorgeous white elephant still claims a prime position in my home and honestly, my space is brimming with positive Ju-Ju and abundance in many forms — an enriched life isn’t just about financial abundance.

Take note of this quote from financial advisor, Suze Orman:

“Abundance is about being rich, with or without money.”

Though, I do continue to work hard at keeping my mindset balanced in positive personal-power, as well as putting in the action and maintaining focus on the endgame — my deepest desires in life.

Next, we’re talking about…

The Penny

Finding coins on the street is usually considered a sign of good fortune.

Apparently, the Chinese folk consider finding coins and money in general signifies good luck. Due to this belief, many people consider coins as their good luck charms and believe that they bring them luck in various life situations.

Then there’s this:

“See a penny, pick it up, and all day long you’ll have good luck.”

You know this phrase from the film Grease, right?

Me too.

In fact, I still recite those words to my children when they get excited about finding a coin on the street. I tell them that it’s good luck.

Interestingly, the original version of this phrase was actually, “see a pin and pick it up and all day long you’ll have good luck”.

Did you know that? It was a reference to a pagan ritual in which a pin could be used in a good luck spell.

The myth was that a dropped pin might have been used in such a spell and would provide good luck to the person who finds it.

Does it work?

It depends on how you look at it.

Wayne Dyer said it best:

“Every time I pick up a coin from the street, I view it as a symbol of the abundance God sends into my life and feel gratitude. Never do I ask ‘why only a penny’?”

Which flows this conversation into….

The Most Powerful Money Charm

Money charms, weird superstitions and ancient beliefs on attracting money can be a fascinating topic to explore — especially the part about delving into the rich history and thought behind the mythology and folklore where the notions originated.

I think people will always need to draw on some type of belief system in order to help keep the faith when it comes to attracting wealth and abundance in their lives, but no talisman will be so powerful as the mindset we choose to adopt.

In his book, The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People Stephen Covey says:

“An abundance mentality springs from internal security, not from external rankings, comparisons, opinions, possessions, or associations.”

And there it is — the most powerful wealth-attracting charm at your disposal is your ability to adopt an abundance mindset and then back it up with action — the hard work behind your passions.

Cultivating mindfulness is what makes all the difference between creating a mindset of scarcity or abundance if you want to bring richer experiences into your world.

After all, according to Oprah Winfrey:

“If you look at what you have in life, you will always have more. If you look at what you don’t have in life, you will never have enough.”

Maybe that’s the secret behind every money charm — the fact that they give their possessor the tools to help shift their perspective to an abundance mindset.

Whatever works, right?

Originally published by Living Out Loud on Medium

1. Most Rich Mexican Men Have Multiple Girlfriends

2. The Mexican Upper-layer is Miles from the Poorest

3. Cash Needs to be Spent and This is How They do it

4. Racism is More Real Than Ever

5. You Will Get Spoilt, But Only if You Listen to Their Rules

Anna Foga is trying to be a fearless writer on topics most people don’t want to talk about. Connect and read more from Anna on Medium.

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The Money Frog

Does it work?

The Money Cat

Does it work?

The Money Elephant

Does it work?

The Penny

Does it work?

The Most Powerful Money Charm

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